Queerstioning, what independence ?

 

Subjective Perception:  Namibia @ 27 

Roots, they bind me.

Culture, rooted within my faith.

Proud I am to be of the soil,  of the land of the brave.

 

Namibian child I am,

pure and gratified.

Struggles I have witnessed,

lived through- unimaginable pains

for today where I can freely walk in my democracy, ‘Acclaimed’

 

Or do I? There are thoughts on my mind that I ponder on endlessly,

because for a land so brave and democratic…

So free and peaceful…

I question, whether I can factually say I walk freely in my  ‘Acclaimed’democracy

27 years of Independence as a country.

Here I am still questioning, as I still can’t fathom what it means to reap the liberation accorded to all.

The celebrations, the commemorations – have me juggle the truthfulness of who we are as Namibia.

The language of freedom, equality, socio-economic development has manifested its subjectivisms’ that clearly violates the values of what we stand for!

What then? Why then, did we watch as our sisters and brothers got whipped,

lead marches for our freedom just to be gunned down? Why then did we leave our homes?

Why did we experience exile?…

 

Was the sole purpose not because we wanted to be treated as human beings?

Did we not want to be seen equal to white people and enjoy the privileges they had too?

Did we not fight beliefs and battles to be able to love across racial borders?

Was the freedom we fought for not for some of these very purposes-

If so and believing the essence of where I hail from I know we faced great trials to be where we are today…

 

Therefore, I fail to comprehend- when my country shuns me and calls me un-Namibian,

How we could together as a nation repeat the pains inflicted on us by our colonisers…

Within this era of liberation, I experience a recolonisation by my own people.

 

My identity is layered, however, I am no different…

As I continue to strive for better, my experience of injustice seems to grow daily.

As the bubbles brew deep inside of me, I know it stems from me not having any space

to offload, when many claim support systems all ‘round… Mirage- Rather.

 

I desire a Namibia that upholds the diversity within our realities,

within our borders. The realities that advanced the consciousness of our narratives- they that define our heritage.

A heritage that has laid a foundation, one our ancestors hoped would create peace, stability and eventually an enabling space that dignifies all Namibians.

I anticipate, anxiously for my country’s realisation

that, I too hail from the very soil they fought on for my freedom, for my liberation…

That I am no different, though my identity is layered…

 

 By: Linda RM Baumann

19 March 2017

08h25

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